Bar patron: [walks in, looks around] “OH, okay! You sell LEATHER. This is a LEATHER shop.”
I… thought that was self-explanatory. On account of, y’know, all the leather.
If I had it to do again, I would grab a jockstrap and a bottle of lube and yell, “WRONG. We’re a POLYESTER AND SILICONE SHOP.” But I can’t decide if I want there to be a next time or not.
Marjorie's Forgeries 
The Candy Store in town does not sell Candy. Nor does it rent her out for the evening. They might actually be closed now. Damn them feminists for closing all the strip clubs. How’s a girl supposed to get thru college now?
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