Leather Bar-ista

Customer: “I’d like a bottle of Jungle Juice, please.”

Me: “Plus, Black, or Platinum?”

Customer: “Regular.”

Dear every Starbucks employee with whom I’ve ever interacted:

I’ve been a terrible dick to all of you, and I sincerely apologize. From here on out, I promise to order grandes instead of mediums.

Author: Thumper (MJ)

Thumper Marjorie Forge is a Gardnerian High Priest, an initiate of the Minoan Brotherhood, a devout Discordian, a recovering alcoholic, and a notary public

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