A Privilege Carol

Straight Girl: [across the store] “Hey.”

Me: [at the register, to the customer in front of me] “Your total is $70.35.”

Straight Girl: “HEY.”

Me: [to the customer in front of me] “Ok, you’re all set. Have a good night.” [then, to her]  “May I help you?”

Straight Girl: “So this [pointing to a union suit] is for men, and that [pointing to a leather miniskirt] is for women?”

[Inner Me: Gender-specific dress codes are outdated social constructs designed to oppress both cis women and individuals on the nonbinary spectrum.]

Me: “Yes.”

Straight Girl: “Well, why is the ladies’ stuff so revealing, while the men’s stuff covers everything?”

[Inner Me: You speak in too many italics.]

Me: “Union suits are very revealing.”

Straight Girl: [arms crossed; one brow raised confrontationally]

Me: [winning smile]

Straight Girl: [rolls eyes, flounces away]

I do appreciate the chutzpah it took to bow up in a gay bar and accuse the guy selling cock rings of objectifying women, but the fact that she did so while standing next to a display of tear-away codpieces kinda, y’know, bled the blister from her bluster.

Later in the evening, I overheard someone politely but firmly ask her to please stay out of the men’s room. She seemed affronted by that. I can only imagine how quickly her devastating Yelp review will shut this place down.

Author: Thumper (MJ)

Thumper Marjorie Forge is a Gardnerian High Priest, an initiate of the Minoan Brotherhood, a devout Discordian, a recovering alcoholic, and a notary public

5 thoughts on “A Privilege Carol”

    1. Ripcord has a men’s room and a gender-unspecified room. The men’s room has a urinal trough and a stall with no door, while the other restroom is a one-seater with a toilet.

      There’s a big sign on the men’s room door that says, “No Sex in the Restroom.” Given the bar’s reputation, a straight girl will occasionally interpret the sign as reverse psychology and pop in to see some sights. Other times, women go in there to pee, which is fine, although there is usually a kerfuffle when they realize the stall doesn’t actually offer privacy and start trying to force all the dudes out.

      Liked by 1 person

      1. To hell with anyone who would go in there trying to sneak a peek at someone else’s sex. I mean, granted, chances are if you’re fucking in a bathroom, you’re probably not terribly worried about voyeurism, but still. You don’t watch sex you weren’t invited to watch. It’s just common curtesy.

        Liked by 1 person

  1. This is why I’m generally against straight people in gay spaces. Most of the time they’re respectful, but people like this ruin it for everyone. Like, not all dogs shit and piss everywhere, but it’s that one mutt that’s not housetrained that makes stores put up “No Dogs Allowed” signs. Straight people are dogs, I guess I’m saying.

    I don’t know. It’s Christmas and Christmas is fighting weather. I blame too much family.

    Liked by 1 person

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