The English translation is, “You have an unusually hairy chest, madam.” I probably should’ve left that one in context.

Another GLUE Weekend has come and gone, but it left in its wake a multitude of random conversational snippets, which I have lovingly gathered, spit-polished, and set on display for the world to read. Fasten your safety belts, my loyal Marjorettes, because it’s finally time for…


“It’s the ones you don’t hear coming… until it’s in your eyes.”

“I’m putting out firecrotches.”

“Is mixing Nike and Adidas like mixing polka-dots and plaids?”

“‘Deer in Headlights’ looks well on you.”

“Like you’ve never seen brothers make out before.”


Dirk Caber molested me. If I die tonight, I die happy.”

“I don’t want to know your name. Put something in my mouth.”

“I have had way, way, WAY too many conversations about meat trays.”

“I put out the Do Not Not Disturb sign, because I don’t want the maid to have to deal with those sheets.”

“Ihre brust ist ungewöhnlich behaart, gnädige Frau.”

“Yeah, you like it, hamster-pig.”

“Walk into the room paddle first.”

“That sounds like a soap opera. Or a Cher movie.”

“IML is not backlit.”

“If I take off anything else, it’ll be a felony.”

“Your hair is so pretty. I just want to scalp you and hang it on my wall.”

“I can punch you in the balls if it’ll make you feel better.”

“Leather moved in, kaftans moved out.”

“That’s the cutest picture! I don’t even feel violated.”

“Are those poppers organic?”

“He’s Dr. Jekyll and Fister Hyde.”

“No, YOU suck my banana.”

“Just because you’re riding it doesn’t make you a top.”

“We appreciate that you wore your special pee-on shoes just for us.”

“Go have your midlife crisis in someone else’s room.”

“She died doing what she loved: making everyone uncomfortable.”

“This is the best GLUE ever.” “Me too.”

Author: Thumper (MJ)

Thumper Marjorie Forge is a Gardnerian High Priest, an initiate of the Minoan Brotherhood, a devout Discordian, a recovering alcoholic, and a notary public

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