[A customer walks in without a mask.]
Customer: “Hi, I have a question.”
Me: “Okay, but first I need you to put your mask on.”
Customer: “It’s in my pocket.”
Me: “And I need it on your face.”
Customer: “WELL, I DON’T WANT IT ON MY FACE.”
He immediately showed himself out, which saved me the effort of banning him, but honestly, at this stage in the game, I do not understand why people still get uppity about masks. Personally, I plan on wearing them long after the various vaccines become available, for three basic reasons:
1. They’re an inexpensive way to satisfy that normally irresistible compulsion I have to buy and hoard T-shirts.
2. I did not survive alcoholism, nor any number of questionable life choices, just to be taken out by some random queen breathing on me.
3. I have gotten so good at smizing, y’all.
Marjorie's Forgeries 
“It’s in my pocket.”
Bitch, your pocket ain’t the one breathing on me.
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Also, I feel like I need that bee mask you’re wearing in the middle left, what with my status as being the Charon of the bees. Four of the damn things showed up in my space to die in front of me in the last month. Which is impressive considering how rarely I go outside, now. It’s starting to get creepy.
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The bee mask is my favorite, although it tends to get in my mouth when I talk, which makes me feel like a Muppet.
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Looking at your pics of you smizing reminds me of practicing that in the mirror as a teenager
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