Dr. Marjorie Westheimer

Customer: [going back and forth between two different brands of lube] “Can I ask you a question?”

Me: “Sure.”

Customer: “I mean… a personal question. Just between you and me.”

Me: “Go for it.”

Customer: ” What would you recommend if you’re going to be… y’know, with a guy who’s… um… bigger… than you’re used to?”

Me: “What would I recommend?”

Customer: “Yes.”

Me: “Patience.”

Customer: “…”

Me: “You’re welcome.”

I should totally give advice for a living, you guys.

Author: Thumper (MJ)

Thumper Marjorie Forge is a Gardnerian High Priest, an initiate of the Minoan Brotherhood, a devout Discordian, a recovering alcoholic, and a notary public

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